Pepsi Fail

11 10 2009

 

I just bought a lifetime supply of CocaCola products, thanks to Pepsi’s incredibly offensive new iPhone app.  The app, called AMP Up Before You Score (apparently aiming to promote Pepsi’s AMP energy drink), helps men “score” with different types of women by breaking us down into 24 categories, including “sorority girl,” “indie rock chick,” “womens studies major,” and “married.”  Awesome, Pepsi, you really outdid yourself on this one.

Once a woman is defined by her type, says the advertisement, “the rest is a snap. Check the app for her profile, and review the cheat-sheet providing details as to what she’s into, and more importantly what sure-fire pick-up lines will cinch the deal.” 

Is she into art? Quote Picasso!  Is she into the environment?  Recycle your beer can!  Does she have a brain?  Get rid of your pathetic, womanizing iPhone app before she realizes you’re a tool! 

Here’s the best part: after you score with the girl thanks to the cool app on your iphone, you can click a link that automatically brags about it on Facebook and Twitter.  So classy.

You have to see this with your own eyes to believe it:

I’m… I’m speechless. How did this fly with both Pepsi and Apple?  Aren’t there women who work at those companies?  Did they not get invited to the editorial meeting? 

Let’s take a look at the 24 categories:

Artist
Aspiring Actress
Athlete
Bookworm
Businesswoman
Celebrity
Cougar
Dancer
Foreign Exchange Student
Goth Girl
Indie Rock Girl
Married
Military Girl
Nerd
Out-Of-Your-League Girl
Political Girl
Princess
Punk Rock Girl
Rebound Girl
Sorority Girl
Treehugger
Trouble
Twins
Women’s Studies Major

I probably fall into about 10 of those categories.  If a man tried to use this app to figure me out, his iPhone would explode in his face.  I mean, Women’s Studies major?  Here’s a better way to use your phone to figure out what kind of books a Women’s Studies major might enjoy: dial her number and ask her, you jackass. 

Is anyone actually going to use this?  And more importantly, why are Pepsi and Apple endorsing a program that aims to help men score with married women?  Am I the only person that has a major, major problem with that? 

I smell a Pepsi boy-cott on the horizon.

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12 responses

11 10 2009
Jayne Landry

This is obscene. Truly disappointed with all involved with this type of thing that is an socio-anthropological anachronism. Have Pepsi and iphone joined together to encourage their clientele to revisit/discover (depending on age) a sorry state of affairs regarding relationships? Some adjectives that might apply to this mindset include stupid, sorry, sinking, smallminded. Informed consumers may choose to not support/invest in a company promoting such ****.

11 10 2009
bros

hardcore lame. I love that no matter what type they are, they all have the same tits and insouciant expression. the good thing is that any guy who has to resort to using iphone apps to ‘score’ falls into only one category: asshat, and any girl who falls for iphone-assisted interactions and goes to bed with one of these Loser Mcretards deserves to have the whole thing posted on facebook. stupid technology+socially inept idiots = the perfect idiocy. wont evolution eventually take care of this?

12 10 2009
Roosh

This is pretty hilarious. “Vegan restaurant stat” haha so true

12 10 2009
rockymtnhigh

I’m using this app to test out my compatibility with my GF. Hehehehe…

12 10 2009
rockymtnhigh

Of course…that type of advertising is aimed for that demographic of guys who also believe that if they use axe soap they’re getting laid as well.

12 10 2009
गैब्रियल

BWAH HA HA HA HA!!!!! (What’s funny about that is some people might actually think that is a great tool for picking meeting women.)

I would have been with you on a Pepsi boycott if you said “It has (around) 45 grams of sugar in each can,” but this only cinches the deal! Who do they think they are?? (Feeding us like cattle and encouraging unmitigated chauvinism…) I guess frat boys have infiltrated the highest ranks of corporate America.

(Is there really a question why much of the world looks at the USofA with ultimate disdain??)

12 10 2009
Sara

That’s so bizarre. as a self-proclaimed feminist, i also fall into about 10 of those categories. Diet coke it is!

12 10 2009
graber

you may be offended. but i pose ONE question to you:

What has Coca-Cola done to help get me laid?

14 10 2009
Jayne Landry

you need help, huh??

12 10 2009
BS

I think you need to chill out, Woman’s Study Major

13 10 2009
Geoffwb

You got hearrrrd girl… though this is about as sincere as tweet apologies get.

http://gizmodo.com/5380652/pepsi-issues-apology-for-offensive-iphone-dating-app

Lets all revel in the satire of the thing and giggle at how many people will now download it, not in spite of all the haters, but because of them. Sick.

14 10 2009
shley

they know how low they placed the bar. they did it deliberately. I think the axe comparison is spot-on. They’ve run a very successful campaign on being so ridiculous that the expectations of verisimilitude no longer apply to them and they’re free to deal in fantasy. They thrive on the controversy this extreme encourages and escape repercussions with their own ludicrousness. (But it’s not real!) Slippery, cunning, and base.

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