What are you thankful for?

21 11 2009

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays, mainly because of the fried turkey (yes fried), sweet potatoes and pumpkin pie.  I’m less impressed by the part when you go around the circle and say what you’re thankful for, because everyone always says something obvious and generic, like “family” or “health.”  Family and health are of utmost importance, of course, but being thankful for those two things is kind of a given, right?

I’d like to make a rule.  Only the first two people in the circle can say “family” and “health,” and then everyone else has to think outside the box.

Here are ten things I’m thankful for this year, besides family and health:

1. My abnormally long toes, which kind of function as fingers on my feet.  Surprisingly useful.

2. Bobby-pins.  Nothing’s more annoying during an athletic activity than hair falling in your face.  I feel super lucky to have a stash of bobby-pins to keep those flyaways in check.

3. Philip Seymour Hoffman.

4. Cheese.

5. My landlord, who won’t fix the leak in our roof or let me have a dog.  Whoa, that was passive aggressive.

6. This pink and blue plaid flannel shirt, without which I would have had nothing to wear every day for the past two weeks.

7. Oprah.  She has single-handedly kept the book publishing industry afloat for the past 20 years.  Now she’s dropping it like a bad habit, but I guess I’m still thankful. And bitter. Backstabbing bitch.

8. Facebook. I know, seems like a lame answer, but without Facebook I would have lost touch with at least half of you, so, cheers to me being able to see how annoying your job is, what your babies look like and who dumped you last week without actually having to ask.  ps. You might want to rethink that new profile pic, unless you don’t mind looking constipated.

9. Scrabble.  I always win, which is fun for everyone.

10. Native Americans, for allowing us to continue to propagate that cute and completely fictitious story about the Pilgrims getting along with the Indians for a day. Slash massacring them and spreading disease.

That about does it for me.  What are you thankful for this year?

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16 responses

21 11 2009
Amanda

This Thanksgiving, I’m thankful that I believe in evolution, that i believe dinosaurs once roamed the earth, and that I believe human-like species evolved many thousands of years ago but became extinct through DNA mismanagement, while our ancestors somehow managed to stick it out until there were over 6 billion of us. If we can do that, we can solve the enormous problems. For example, we may be able to slow global warming. We may figure out what to do with the Asian Silver Carp, imported to the US rivers from China in the 70’s to clean the water. They are such prolific breeders and have grown so big, they have taken over the rivers, competing with all the natural and more edible species. They also leap so high out of the water, they ruin boat engines! Check this out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jb8OmEr7VqI.
And, finally, our highly successful species may figure out what to do about the increasing number of Americans who do not believe in evolution. In the last two decades, the number of Americans who do not believe in evolution has increased from 10% to 25%. We rank second to the bottom of countries, just above Turkey, in terms of percentage of people who believe in evolution. (NPR) Yes, I’m hopeful. And, I’m thankful. Happy Thanksgiving!

22 11 2009
Pita L.

I’m thankful for Google Docs, which has allowed me to appear much smarter and computer savvy than I actually am.

I’m thankful for automatic spell checking. I would probably be failing grad school right now without it.

Lastly, I’m thankful for podcasts–they have revolutionized my commuting experience.

P.S. Thank God for bobby-pins!

22 11 2009
CB

I am thankful for coffee, chocolate and XM radio in my car.

23 11 2009
bros

interns
waterproof mascara
texting google
probiotics
polar fleece
smoked salmon

23 11 2009
Edward Dandyhands

I am thankful for Johnny Depp and Winona Ryder for being in the 1990 cult classic, Edward Scissorhands.

I am also grateful for the Atlanta Center for Puppetry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Center_for_Puppetry_Arts

23 11 2009
Vjane

I am thankful for Airplanes. They get me there in a hurry – my time is running out.
Silk Repair for my overbleached hair
Walmart
Lisa, my pedicure lady
Eggs, bacon and grits

23 11 2009
Geof

shoulders of giants that let me see just a little bit farther. old wooden furniture. internet. wheels. coffee. yoga. my overall good health. statins.

24 11 2009
districtramblings

you broke the rule, geof. the ONE rule. “health” doesn’t count.

24 11 2009
Geof

But I thought Eve broke the one rule and then she knew somethin and made us all unhealthy like them vampires you was referrin to? Stop tryin to trick me with yer fancy book learnin and yer high city livin with feathers in yer hats!

23 11 2009
CB

anesthesia
air conditioning
tv remote controls

23 11 2009
geoff

I love that Geof with one f is repping so hard with the newton quotes. Personally, I stand on the shoulders of Tree Ents… their hair sorta smells but I’m thankful for getting a sweet view anyway.
Also… modular software, feeling like I live in the future when I use an iPhone, 1.5 inch deep LED TV’s, chandeliers, brunch, good health, hulu and nightelves.

I also agree with giving thanks for Walmart, google docs, air conditioning, anesthesia and Philip Semor Hoffman… but tv remotes are antiquated and Facebook must die.

23 11 2009
CB

Remotes are antiquated? What do you flip your channels with?

23 11 2009
geoff

A keyboard or my phone… then again, channels are also antiquated 🙂

23 11 2009
geoff

you’re right though.. those are just new kinds of remotes so I’m thankful for them taking on new forms. More accurately, TV and how we historically interact with the media it provides is what’s getting dated…

24 11 2009
gvinberlin

I especially appreciate numero ten – 1/16th of me says “you’re welcome.” the other 15/16ths of me want to say that i’m thankful for your beautiful gv. and also, all 16/16ths of me want to say that you by NO means always win at scrabble. i challenge you to a duel, sir. (odds are you will win it… drat.)

i miss you. (like the deserts miss the rain – implied) and am thankful for YOU. i’ll raise a glass of pilsner to you and our gv’s…

25 11 2009
Vjane

CB- When I “flip” a channel, it is usually some dumb program or other obnoxious program and I use my middle digit on my right hand and then use my remote to “change” the channel.

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