My First Apple Pie

18 01 2011

I’ve always wondered what it would be like to give birth to a really ugly baby. I know I’d still love the baby, obviously, but would I realize it was ugly, being overwhelmed with all the new mommy emotions? And if I did realize it was ugly, would I feel embarrassed about introducing it to other people and having to sit through their obligatory gushings over how cute it is when I know they think it’s ugly?

Well, I didn’t give birth to a baby this evening, unfortunately, so I can’t answer that question for anyone. But I did make my first apple pie from scratch, and man did it turn out ugly! In addition to not having enough dough to stretch all the way over the top of it, I didn’t have one of those brushes to brush the raw egg onto, so I just kinda plopped it on there with a fork and moved it around a little. In the end, the egg drippage and ill-fitting crust make for a mighty heinous looking pie, but don’t let that fool you. It tastes so delicious. In fact, it tastes better than skinny feels, so even Kate Moss can eat it.

Here’s a pictorial of the final stretch:

Assistant apple chopper, sampling the filling.

Holding my hideous, sweet-smelling pie, fresh out of the oven.

Kissing my newborn pie. Isn't she adorable, minus the disturbing egg drippage?

Uh oh, got excited and sliced in too soon!


Assistant chopper/pie elitist, visibly disappointed by her slice.

Admittedly, there were some adhesion issues.

Mmm, homemade apple pie with a baked egg film!  It almost feels like I gave birth to a really ugly baby, but I’m just so beaming and proud of the damn thing that I don’t care what anyone thinks.



3 responses

18 01 2011

did you not have vanilla icecream? it hides a multitude of pie sins.

18 01 2011

Ice cream, good call. I knew it was missing something.

20 02 2011

It really is an ugly apple pie but I love that you didn’t give up. As for ugly baby, you were the most beautiful baby and still are. Practice makes perfect!

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